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Gap Year

Just take a gap year,” friends tell me

If only it were that simple

Why is it so hard for them to understand?

Four long, oblivious years down the drain

Like dirty rainwater flowing languidly, aimlessly into sewers

Shoulda, coulda, woulda


Regrets and no take-backs

If I had only focused more

But my glasses were the wrong prescription

Slacked off less

But my belt, insecure, stayed loose

What will I tell my parents?

Pressure to redeem my family

Expectations to outstrip my failing brother

Graduate applications creep quietly closer

Like spiders crawl sneakily towards their prey

Anticipated and, still, uninvited

Notebooks fill up like fattened stomachs

Due dates and reminders

Time runs out as the last grain of rice disappears from the pot

My future is ordained

Invisible ink on camouflaged paper

For now

Submit and wait

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